A Great Score For The Worst Movie Of All Time!

Incredible as it may seem, the movie that is consistantly judged as the "Worst Movie of All Time" has one of the best music scores of any 1960s film. The score (composed by Andre Previn) was conducted by John Williams and it brought Willliams his very first Academy Award nomination (not so surprisingly, the film's only nomination). Most of songs in the film are appallingly bad and include such stunners as "I'll Plant My Own Tree", "It's Impossible", "Come Live With Me" and "Give a Little More" written by Dory Previn. The only exception is "(Theme from) Valley of the Dolls" sung in the film by Dionne Warwick (but not on the soundtrack album). The song later became a major hit for Warwick and her first million seller. Somehow, John Williams managed to adapt all of the material into a beautiful, haunting score that is the best thing about the film. Although violently attacked by the majority of critics in 1967, the film became 20th Century Fox's biggest non-roadshow box-office hit at the time, earning over $50 million world-wide. It was the time when audiences ignored film critics (i.e. "The Sound of Music").

Glitzy Garbage Galore

I couldn't see this film in 1967, because I was just a high school boy, and the film was rated for "adult content and language". I finally saw it a few years ago. No big deal!
Although this movie isn't well known over here in Japan, the DVD IS available, and needless to say, I got it--widescreen and all. As I opened the seal, I was praying.."Oh God, PLEASE let there be an audio commentary by Patty Duke ALL THROUGH this movie!" But no. I would just LOVE to hear her tell all about it. If the U.S. DVD comes out in a special edition with JUST SUCH a treasure included (and many more), then YES, I WILL buy it as well!
The visual complement to this film is as sumptuous as the acting and writing are atrocious! Those "pony-tail on top of the head" hairstyles look very sleek and chic these days...the look is very "Surfside Six-pre-hippy 60's". Brings back a lot of fun memories.
Read some of the other great reviews on this page, for some amazingly quippy quotes, always good for a laugh.
In the meantime, I'll keep praying that this film gets the deluxe version DVD presentation treatment it deserves for its upcoming U.S. release. Everybody, keep your fingers crossed!

"Outta My Way......... I've Got A Man Waiting For Me!".

The above review title is just one of the juicy, over the top lines piled on in this delicious treat which probably has one of the most campiest reputations of any movie from the glorious 1960's which was rich in such efforts. People just love to hate this trashy but highly enjoyable movie based on the best seller by Jacqueline Susann and I have to admit I love every tacky and wildly over the top moment myself. Never I believe has one film abounded with so many (possibly), unintentionally hysterical moments from Patty Duke's wild rehearsal number with a string necklace that seems to have a provocative mind of its own in showing off her... ummm, shall we say "chief assests", to Sharon Tate agreeing with her mother over the phone that "yes I know I have no talent and yes I am continuing with my breast exercises mother!", to Susan Hayward's ghastly "hit Broadway show", number complete with a ridiculous revolving mobile made up of plastic shapes that look like multi coloured body parts. The highlight of course of the entire film is the infamous wig pulling scene in the ladies room between long time rivals Patty Duke as the Judy Garland like Neely O'Hara and Susan Hayward playing Helen Lawson, a character based loosely on Broadway Diva Ethel Merman. For this scene alone "Valley of the Dolls", has earned a dubious immortality but which nevertheless makes this film essential viewing.

"Valley of the Dolls", of course chronicles the ups and mostly downs of three young career women who find life contains alot of ugliness beneath the glitter. The three women are the intelligent brunette Anne Welles (Barbara Parkins), who comes from her conservative New England town to create an exciting new life for herself in New York, an up and coming singer Neely O'Hara (Patty Duke), who has a brilliant talent but also a self destructive element in her character, and finally the beautiful leggy blonde Jennifer North (Sharon Tate), who has limited talent but stunning looks that open doors for her. Anne becomes involved with Lyon Burke (Paul Burke), at who's theatrical law firm she works, Neely gets discovered singing on a telethon and shoots to the height of stardom only to come crashing down with her misuse of pills or "Dolls", after which she also ruins Anne's chance at happiness by stealing Paul away from her. Meanwhile Jennifer sees her life cave in as her partner Tony (Tony Scotti), is struck down by a crippling disease and she is reduced to appearing in French porn movies to pay his bills only to discover then that she has breast cancer herself. While these women are experiencing the school of hard knocks one survivor goes on untouched by the human tragedy. Broadway Diva Helen Lawson (Susan Hayward), a tough and cold veteran of the theatrical world continues to pull all the strings when she gets Neely fired from her show when she sees her as a potential rival and after Neely's disgrace in Hollywood sees her fail a second time as a result of her pill abuse. Helen is a cold calculating woman, a "barracuda", as she lovingly describes herself, who is totally alone in the world and will do anything to hold on to her piece of turf which of course is her stardom on Broadway. The women all find their own ways to deal or not deal with their situations and we see Anne eventually return to the sane but predictable life she left in New England without Paul who she is not ready to marry, Jennifer commits suicide rather than face the terrors of breast cancer surgery, and Neely after completely ruining her chance at a comeback on Broadway finds herself alone, unwanted, and out of a job with only her "dolls", for company.

Certainly the original novel by Jacqueline Susann could never be called a literary classic, being exploitation fiction of the worst kind but the film has managed to take on a cult status uniquely its own over the years. It's shameless characters very clearly based on real personalities of the time like Judy Garland and Ethel Merman, it's terrible dialogue and hilarious situations that produce laughs even when it is meant to be serious have ensured that "Valley of the Dolls", is a camp classic of the first order. It's really hard to judge the performances in this piece considering the dialogue/situations the actresses had to work with . Patty Duke who probably earned the most flak from this production playing the drug soaked singing sensation clearly based on Judy Garland talked about this film in some length in her excellent autobiography "Call Me Anna", and still shudders when her involvement in this film is brought up. A wondefully talented actress, her scenery chewing here just defies belief but her over the top character gives this film alot of its bizzare appeal. Barbara Parkins truly is like a living mannequin in this film playing the "sensible", one of the three with her lacquered hair and flawless makeup and her scenes where she literally over night becomes the "Gillian Girl", are hilarious in their tackiness. The tragic Sharon Tate still most famous for her terrible murder certainly has a breathtaking beauty but she has very little character to work with and her scenes where she talks to her mother on the phone are (unintentionally I'm sure), amazingly hilarious for all the wrong reasons. Susan Hayward came into this unhappy production late into production after the original choice to play the bitchy Helen Lawson, Judy Garland was fired. I find I miss Hayward's campy character when she is not on screen and she has some of the most memorably awful scenes and dialogue in the film from gems like "Tell that son of a bitch to get off his butt and earn his oats" to "They drummed you right outta Hollwood and you come crawling back to Broadway, well Broadway doesn't go for booze or dope!". The atrocious musical number from her Broadway show is a camp highlight where a seemingly dazed Hayward sings a bizzare little ditty called "I Plant My Own Tree", to an unfathomly appreciative audience. On the plus side "Valley of the Dolls", is a lush, beautifully photographed production with the shots of a snow covered New England and the streets of New York a real highlight. Despite it's tacky nature you can see that Twentieth Century Fox went all out in this big screen adaptation of the best selling novel. And for those interested in celebrity spotting Jacqueline Susann who later disowned the film version of her book makes a small cameo appearance as a reporter in the scene where Jennifer North's body is wheeled out to the ambulance.

A camp favourite not to be taken seriously at all is how to best describe "Valley of the Dolls". It's pulp magazine level of storytelling ruins any chance of this story being a serious examination of the plight of young working women however as over the top entertainment this is first class and always gets people talking and laughing about the sheer awfulness of much of it. People are even known as having "Valley of the Dolls", parties with the guests dressed as the characters with the movie playing in the background so I guess it has earned it's questionable place in the entertainment history. Sit back and enjoy the darker side of the glitzy glamour life in 1960's Broadway and Hollywood in the notorious film version of Jacqueline Susann's "Valley of the Dolls", soon.